canadiana-maple-deactivated2016:

Here you go Anon! I hope it’s good.

***

It was not the light that shone in through the tall stained glass windows that comforted Ronan, but rather it was the stillness in the dark that made him feel grounded. He sat in the back of the church, sulking quietly in the very back pew, his forehead leaning against the back of the pew in front of him.

This surely would leave an indent in his skin. For a second, Ronan thought it would be wise to move from this position, to avoid the red mark that the pew would leave on his face, but then he thought, why? Who am I going to see anyway? Who cares?

This was a defeating thought. Tonight, no one would know his anger or his strife except the Holy Spirit.

Ronan breathed deeply, inhaling the smell of the church. Incense, flowers from ceremonies passed, and other people’s laundry detergent.

Just as soon as Ronan had immersed himself in the stillness of the church, a door opened somewhere in the front hall. He wasn’t sure if it was the side door, leading up to where Adam lived now, or if it was the front door. If it was the front door this would tell Ronan that he’d spent the whole night there and it was now so early that the church staffs were now appearing for work.

It was not the front door. Gentle footsteps padded along the velvet burgundy carpet that led into the mass hall. The pews groaned in protest of the weight laid upon them as Adam sat down next to Ronan, a distance away.

“That pew’s going to leave a mark on your head,” Adam said. This was allowed.

Ronan pulled himself up from his slouch and sat up straight in his seat. He shrugged in response to his companion’s words.

Adam shuffled a little in his spot next to Ronan, moving a little closer. For a moment Adam searched his bag for something; he brought his bag to work with him every day, and of course back home. It had everything in there that life could ever demand from him, and one of these things was his deck of tarot cards.

He cherished them. Pulling out the velveteen bag, he showed them to Ronan. “Do you want to try a reading?” Adam asked.

Outside, it sounded like it was raining. It was, so far, a sad night. “I hate those things,” Ronan said, a little too loudly for the sacred quiet of the church. Yet, he continued, “but sure. Try it.”

“Okay,” Adam began, opening the velvet bag and carefully pulling the deck of worn cards out. He shuffled them and spoke, “you have to think of a question before you pull the cards though. Do you remember that?”

“Yeah,” Ronan said. “I’m not a halfwit.”

Adam played the cards out before Ronan. “Pick three, if you have your question.”

Carefully, three cards were pulled from the deck. They were placed upon the boys’ thighs, one on each of Adam’s and one on Ronan’s. Face down they looked like a dumb party gimmick, but both of the boys knew what kind of energy the cards held, even though one chose to ignore it and the other had been forced to embrace it.

“You ready?” Adam asked. He sounded tired, but he was always tired. He was also hungry, but then, he was always hungry.

Ronan nodded. Adam flipped the three cards over, a smile forming on his face and growing ever larger as he flipped each card. Outside he could hear that the rain had stopped pouring, and for this Adam was even gladder – tonight, no leaks would come through his roof, and he would sleep a little more soundly.

Ronan peered at the three cards with wonderment that he was too proud to acknowledge. Now that they pertained to him, whether or not he believed them, he wanted them to be good. He looked at Adam’s face to determine the outcome of his cards, and found himself unable to ask the simple question, what do they mean?

It was easy to become lost in Adam’s face like it was easy to be lost in Cabeswater. So much to see and love in that forest.

“This one is good,” Adam began without prompting from Ronan. He pointed to a card labelled the Four of Cups. “That man on the card there, see, he’s sitting alone and all sad. But there’s a gold cup being given to him.”

“So? Is it filled with beer? What’s the meaning of the cup?”

“I was going to continue,” Adam said mildly. He delivered his promise. “It’s a card that tells you not to stop seeking for happiness in your life. Just because you’re sitting alone and bored it doesn’t mean nothing good is happening.”

This was surprisingly comforting, Ronan thought to himself, that a glossy mass-produced piece of cardstock with some pictures painted on it could tell him that there was happiness in his life. He tried not to read into it too much, but still, enjoyed the energy from the card.

Adam moved on to the next card. He waved his hand over it a little, saying, “this one is the Three of Pentacles. It tells you that your hard work is going to pay off sometime soon, and that you can enjoy it.”

Ronan nodded. He looked upon the last card that was perched on his own leg. A woman in a boat was travelling, carrying six swords in her boat with her. She was looking into the distance. The whole thing seemed highly symbolic to Ronan, who disliked the confusion of having to translate each card.

“I like that one,” Adam said to Roan. “Six of Swords. Good card.”

“Why?”

Adam shrugged a little, downplaying whatever affinity he had for the particular card. “It means that you’re going to leave trouble behind,” Adam said. “Or that you’re done with hardships. Something like that. I pull it a lot when I do readings.”

“Yeah?” Ronan asked Adam, “how’s that been working out for you?”

For a moment, the church was utterly silent. Then, in the blanketing quietness, both boys shared a small laugh. Adam collected his cards from his legs and Ronan’s and packed his deck away. Adam looked at Ronan, whose face was sharp in the moonlight that came in from the stained glass, and said to him, “I don’t know why you were here tonight, Ronan, but if you’re going to sleep in the church don’t do it on the pew where you get a mark on your head.”

“There’s nowhere else to sleep, Parrish.”

Adam smiled and stood up, slinging his bag over his shoulder. “My door is always open for you, Lynch.”

***

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